Most people think a prenuptial agreement has only three destinations. It gets signed and placed in a drawer, it resurfaces during a divorce, or it is reviewed after the death of a spouse. Recently, I was reminded that there should be a fourth option, while reading Belle Burden’s memoir on marriage and divorce, Strangers, a Memoir of Marriage. In the book, she realizes that the prenuptial agreement she signed years earlier no longer reflects the life she built or the sacrifices she made during the marriage. By the time she discovers the problem, her husband has left and it is too late to negotiate. Before the wedding, her future husband proposed a seemingly modest change: any assets acquired during the marriage would automatically become shared marital property if they were put in joint name. Although her attorney cautioned that this could create significant marital property in the future and recommended against adding the clause, she went against his advice. She paid for expensive Manhattan real estate and a second home with her own trust fund wealth and put her husband’s name on title.

As the years passed, she devoted little attention to the family’s financial affairs. She titled properties jointly even though her husband made no financial contribution, and assumed everything would work out because the marriage was successful. It was only much later, when her husband left with no explanation, that she realized how the language of the prenuptial agreement, and the joint title of real estate bought over the course of the marriage, dramatically affected her rights. What seemed like a minor provision before the wedding became enormously significant decades later.  Her husband claimed ownership in the real estate because he was on title, not because he had contributed financially.

Whether fiction or real life, when couples sign a prenuptial agreement, they are making decisions based on who they are at that moment in time. They may have similar incomes, no children, modest assets, and optimistic expectations about the future. Ten, twenty, or even thirty years later, things may have changed. One spouse may have left a successful career to raise children, followed the other across the country or around the world, or supported the growth of a family business. Meanwhile, wealth may have grown far beyond what either spouse imagined. The agreement that once seemed fair may later produce an unexpected and inequitable result.

Just as people update their estate plans, insurance coverage, and retirement strategies, they should periodically review their marital agreements. That review does not necessarily mean making changes. Instead, it is an opportunity to understand what the agreement actually provides and whether it still aligns with the couple’s intentions.

Many people are surprised to learn that they have forgotten the details of their own agreement. They remember signing it before the wedding but cannot recall whether it limits spousal maintenance, protects future business interests, waives inheritance rights, or establishes a formula for dividing property after a long marriage. Some agreements become more favorable over time, while others become increasingly one-sided because of changes in careers, health, family circumstances, or the law.

A good time to revisit a prenuptial agreement is after a significant life event. The birth of children, the sale or purchase of a business, retirement planning, receipt of an inheritance, substantial increases in wealth, relocation to another state, or a major career change are all natural checkpoints. Even if no amendment is needed, reviewing the agreement together can create transparency and ensure that both spouses understand their financial expectations moving forward.

If, after reviewing the agreement, both spouses conclude that it no longer reflects their shared intentions, they may be able to enter into a postnuptial agreement. Unlike a prenuptial agreement, a postnuptial agreement is negotiated after marriage and can modify or replace earlier provisions, subject to applicable state law. The goal is not to renegotiate every successful marriage, but to avoid discovering decades later that an outdated agreement no longer reflects the partnership the couple actually built.

Perhaps it is time to retire the old saying that a prenuptial agreement has only three outcomes: the drawer, divorce, or death. I would add a fourth—periodic review. Spending an hour with experienced counsel every five to ten years may be one of the least expensive financial checkups a couple can undertake. If nothing else, both spouses will know where they stand. And if changes are appropriate, they can make thoughtful decisions together rather than leaving those decisions to a courtroom years later.

For questions about Prenuptial Agreements – or other Family Law issues – the Family Law Practice Group at Lasher is here to help.